Bonding through Ball Pits, Pretzels, and a Big Sister Who Knows His Name.

Days 3 & 4 at the Eastern European Orphanage.  The weather is chilly so we have to spend most of our time in a big playroom with a ball pit and gym mats.  N seems to love it, but of course he'd much rather be outside.

It also doesn't help that the room is actually a pass-through from one part of the hospital to the other and people are constantly coming in and out.  I'm certain he's played with everything in this room millions of times, but he still hyper-actively flits from one thing to another.  His Baba has a small bag of pretzels as a treat for him, and we've been using it to teach him the ASL sign for "more" for which he has already successfully learned the proper usage.  He's actually very smart.

The biggest reality for us is that we're not adopting an almost four-year old.  Because of his mental delay, we're basically adopting a one-year old.  His play is very similar to that of a baby's.  He's very curious and he doesn't play with other children, but he will play alongside of them and try to do what they do.   He has a short attention span, and although he understands most of what's being said to him, his stubborn streak often gets in the way of doing anything that isn't his idea.  His only words are "Da" (yes) and "Nay" (no).  We spoke to his speech therapist and psychologist and both agree that he has some form of mental delay, but both are optimistic that a family setting will be tremendously better for him than the institutional life he has only ever known.

Stray cats often take over the playground

Yesterday afternoon we showed him a video of Vivien saying "I love you, N" and holding a picture she drew for him.  He recognized his name and was immediately enthralled and watched the video on my phone no less than twenty times.  

Viv's video

Watching Big Sister

We've accomplished so much this week literally and emotionally.  We took him to get his visa picture (his first car ride in who knows how long?) and we signed more adoption documents to move the process along.  In the short time we've been here, we've seen tremendous strides made in his interaction with us, in his ability to learn simple things, and in our capabilities as parents of a special needs child.  A bond is definitely forming.  We can do this.  The tragedy is that we need to temporarily sever that bond tomorrow afternoon as we finish our week of the "Meetcha Trip."  

Trip Two, the "Gotcha Trip" will come in about three to four excruciatingly long months.  We leave behind a few shirts, a Pooh Bear that we hope reminds him of us, and a photo book of his new family members.  We also leave behind our son and consequently pieces of our hearts.  Four months isn't that long in the grand scheme of things and we know that waiting is a right of passage for adoptive families.  In the meantime, at least we have a glimpse into what life will be like with him.  And we'll go ahead and get his bedroom ready, stock up on baby bibs for all his drool, and look into some specialized doctors and services that he might need once he comes home.  

And of course we'll continue to pray:  for him, for the people who care for him, and for us - that we might be forged into the very best parents for this precious little boy God has called us to.